When a Hot List cools off and moves out of town

I wrote several days ago how several moving-related companies mailed to me after I already left town, but I did not expect this to arrive from Thomas United Transfer and Storage.

Their solo mail package deserves Fails for List and Timing. Not only did Thomas Transfer mail the moving offer several weeks late, they mailed it to my new address.

Setting that aside, this is not a bad creative package but could use some tweaks. The outer envelope includes a teaser that is relevant to the consumer – practically everyone who moves needs boxes, so why not get some free. After all, “free” is the most beautiful four-letter word in the English language. The package leads with a friendly cover letter that communicates positive features of the company. Meanwhile, the flyer is more promotional and describes the free box offers.

Some ways creative treatment could be improved in the letter:

• Be consistent with the grammar. Some of the cover letter is written in the first person plural, while the close states, “Please call me …” even though two people signed the letter.
• Actually include a hand signature of Dawn and Christina. Represent who those people are – the owners? Salespeople? Moving coordinators?
• Consider more benefit statements, i.e. low-stress, piece of mind. 

At least Thomas Transfer and Storage only wasted marketing money. I wish they had reached out to me earlier so I would not have ended up with Texas Home Movers damaging and losing my goods.

Learnings: Use a hot list quickly before it cools off.  Don't address-correct a solicitation for moving supplies.  If the person moved, don't mail.

AT&T tweaks it’s upsell letter

I commented on AT&T’s customer service style upgrade letter three times. Below is another letter I received. There are not any new fails, but it is interesting to see how a solo mail package used often can be tweaked and improved. Perhaps this is an evolved Control pakage.  

The upsell this time is for only one bundle, although there is a soft reminder that AT&T would like to meet my needs if this is not the best match. There is no irrelevant mention of DirecTV. ‘Kelly’ personally signs the letter. Overall, the letter is warm, inviting, clear, and supporting. It is promotional but does not feel promotional.  Is this package the right choice for a Control?

A Hot List is hot for a reason

I recently moved across country. Twenty moving companies reached out to me with direct mail offers. Of these, 7 arrived before I made a decision which company to use, 8 arrived after I made a decision, and 5 arrived after I left Houston. Below are examples of postcards that arrived too late.

There could be a few sources these companies used to learn I was preparing to leave town. Based on my actions, I believe they included a listing on the Houston Area Realtor web site and inquiry at movers.com. I also completed a change of address form at the post office, however I do not recall the USPS sharing lists as such.

This one, although late, is interesting.  It offers the prospect an immediate benefit -- a discount at Lowe's.  This $10 off $50 coupon is the same offer that is made available through the US Postal Service's Movers Kit.  Perhaps the cost to Allied is zero, but it is an effective way to break through mailbox clutter.

Of course, the speed in which a company reaches out to you to sell is not necessarily correlated with the quality of it’s service. My furniture was shipped by Texas Home Movers, AKA Texas Home Storage. The shipment was late, and several items were damaged.

The company subbed out work to an independent trucker after telling me they wouldn't.  The trucker claimed he completely offloaded the truck at delivery, but still missed a box that was brought by a week later by his brother in-law with major damage.  6 weeks later, items are still missing and I can’t even get a claim form from the company. Needless to say, I filed a complaint with the Better Business Bureau and took other action.

Learnings: As a business, if you purchase a hot list, use it fast. As a consumer, avoid Texas Home Movers.

Was this the first failed mail?

I recently visited the National Postal Museum in Washington DC.  It includes some interesting history of the US Postal Service and a statue of Ben Franklin.  The architecture of the building is much like that of Union Station next door.  

Included was a small exhibit about the Dead Letter Office.  Many people from Europe would write to their relatives that immigrated to the USA with only city name in the address.  They didn’t realize how large the cities were, and that without a proper address, the postal service could not deliver.

Nearly a century later, the post office now requires more than address to deliver mail in a reasonable time frame.  First they required a zip code, then a zip+4, and now zip+4+2.

Learning: Whether it is for personal or marketing correspondence, know your recipient and completely address the envelope.

Failed Mail Can Lead to a Failed Wedding

Even in the age of Evite, the formal mailed wedding invitation remains the favored method to announce an upcoming marriage and encourage others to join in the celebration.  If you think about it from a marketing standpoint, it is one of the most expensive direct mail solicitation packages targeting consumers.  The happy couple and their parents want people to open the expensive mail, read it, and respond with an RSVP, and usually arrive wearing proper attire.

Which brings me to how it can Fail:  Addressing the invitations.  Too often, people neglect to double-check addresses.  If you haven’t communicated in three years with that second cousin, she might have moved.

Another more common Fail with fancy invitations is legibility.  I recently received an invitation addressed to someone else because the calligrapher got so fancy, the postal service couldn’t figure out the address.  There was confusion between “I” and “7” , “S” and “5”, as well as “4” and “9”.  I tried bringing it to a local post office.  A clerk attempted to identify the correct address, but he eventually gave up and he marked it “Return to Sender”.  If the sender had used a zip+4 with readable numbers, the invitation might have arrived at the correct address.  Instead, someone will not receive their invitation – and anyone who ever got married knows the kind of problems that result from that.

Lesson: Maintain your address list even for personal contacts, and include the zip+4.  Be sure your addresses are readable by Postal Service automated systems, or at least by a human being.

Mixing politics and phone sex is a classic Fail

According to this article at politico.com, a political fundraising letter mistakenly listed a phone number for a phone sex line.  In the article, the RNC blames a vendor.  However, it should blame it's own people for not reviewing the letter and affirmately verifying the phone number on the letter.  This is a classic and embarassing Fail for poor Creative.

The RNC is not the only national organizaton to have a typo lead people to a phone sex line. Another infamous example: AT&T several years ago sent a letter to 175,000 loyal customers with an incorrect phone number. Instead of hearing “Thank you for calling AT&T True Rewards”, recipients who dailed the number on the letter heard “Are you ready to get naked?”

Learning: Always proof every word and every numerical statement in every stage of production. Always verify every phone number included in your mail and be sure it is correct. Don’t just ask someone if a phone number is correct – call it yourself.

Comcast: Sending the same Failed Mail – it’s Comcastic!

This letter from Comcast arrived today. If it looks familiar, it is because it is almost exactly the same failed mail I covered earlier this month. The outer envelope is exactly the same as the first mailing – e.g. semi-blind outer envelope addressed to me “or Current Resident” – so I did not bother scanning it. The letter shown here has the same offer, layout, and body copy as the original letter. The only changes are the respond-by date and response phone number.

This suggests that the original letter was deceptive. The original letter stated “… this special offer is only available until March 31, 2010.” However, it now appears to be widely available for at least another half month. There is nothing wrong with creating urgency by including a specific respond-by date, but stating that an offer expires by that date when in fact it does not is misleading when you plan a second mailing of the same offer. It erodes trust with your customer. An appropriate approach in the original letter would be “Please respond to this special offer by March 31, 2010.” or “To take advantage of this special offer, call 1-xxx-xxx-xxxx by March 31, 2010”.

It is generally not misleading to have a grace period after a respond-by date. For example, if want people to respond by March 31, you could accept responses until say, April 7, because some people read their mail late, don’t get around to calling, or delivery is delayed. What is misleading is when your urgency level suggests the offer is final but you send the same offer with a later offer expiration date.

Let’s assume for the moment that the offer in fact expires April 16 and assume that the rest of the letter is final. Even if the offer is available only for existing customers, including the word “customer” in the close is superfluous. The limitation of “only” does not apply to the availability but to the timeframe. An improved means of closing the letter would be “Hurry! This special offer is available only until April 16, 2010. Call 1-xxx-xxx-xxxx today.” If your manager or legal reviewer is directing you to emphasize that the offer is available only to customers despite having a disclosure, then replace “special” with “exclusive”.

Another Fail for Creative applies for the extra space in the closer between “until” and “April 16, 2010.” Someone did not check the spacing.

Of course, a basic Fail applies for repeating use of the same envelope and letter without material modifications. As explained here, if a recipient does not open or respond to the first letter, there should not be an expectation that the recipient responds to the second one using the exact same approach.

On a positive note, Comcast intelligently used a different phone number in the second mailing. This will enable adequate tracking of raw call counts for each of the two letters.

Learnings:  While it is productive to maintain a sense of urgency, do not mislead customers about when an offer expires. Proofread your grammar and every line in your communication. When resending the same offer, modify the creative from the original version. Track distinctly responses from each sales communication.

Improved communication to friends

Follow-up to my prior posting ... here is an improved version of the letter from Seven Acres I am sharing with the fundraising co-chairs. 

There are different directions the letter can go.  I took the approach this morning of maintaining the core messages from the original letter, adding some urgency to the need, and streamlining the text overall to render it visually palatable.  Specific changes include:
• Paragraphs are shorter, with text being left-justified.
• There is additional quantification, i.e. specific number of years and number of people supported over the years.
• Used a serif font, also to improve readability.
• Names of streets are removed to focus on the benefits Seven Acres delivers.
• The need for a friend is called out clearly with text underlining.
• The page specific for donations is mentioned specifically with a suffix of /friend. This way, people can go directly to the donation page and not get lost on the home page trying to find it. Seven Acres will need to work with it's internet support to set this up, but it should be easy for them.
• There is a time-based call to action rather than date on the letter. This provides some urgency to the request.
• Added a postscript.  This is a typical direct mail technique that has proven results. I reinforced the concept of Seven Acres, a way to learn more about it, and repeated the call to action to be a Friend.  I do not know if they offer tours, but it would certainly be a way to increase engagement among potential supporters.

The above represents text and layout.  Of course, the actual letter should be produced on Seven Acres letterhead.

Letters to friends should be easy to read

This solicitation for donations from Seven Acres is basically typical. It includes a branded outer envelope, request for money, simple response form and business reply envelope (not scanned).  The text of the letter talks to the history of the assisted living residence, the reason it is important to the community, and why the recipient should donate.

There are different ways to improve the content of the letter to improve persuasiveness, however I find myself motivated to write about simply the layout of the letter. The creative Fail is that the letter is hard to read. Simply put, it is not scanable.

• If you glance at the letter quickly, you will see two phrases: “Friends Campaign” and “Friends”. These are the words that are in boldface italics buried in the body copy. These are key words, but not the only ones a reader should take away from a request for money.

• The paragraphs are full justified. This makes the text difficult to read. Only newspapers and legal documents should be full justified. A successful direct mail letter will have text that is flush to the left column, e.g. left justified.

• The paragraphs are too long, especially the opening paragraph. (Long-form paragraphs can be successfully used in letters, but not one-page letters.) Lacking a Johnson Box or some other attention grabber to open the letter, the opening paragraph should be no longer than 2 sentences or 2 lines. It could be as simple as “Your support is desperately needed to help the elderly here in Houston.” Or consider leveraging the friends theme: “Houston area elderly citizens need a friend. Will you please help?”

The issue of timing is minor but also relevant. The letter is dated “February 2010” however it arrived in home in mid-March. The date on this type of letter does not add value under normal circumstances, and loses value when it arrives much later than dated.

My recommendation to the generous Friends Co-chairs at Seven Acres is to pick up a copy of Breakthrough Fundraising Letters by Alan Sharpe.

Learning: Your letter should be easily scanable so the reader can quickly ascertain the purpose. When using a typical letter format, always left-justify body copy. Don’t overload paragraph length on a short letter.

If at first you don’t succeed, don't repeat the Fail

In January, I evaluated a solo mail package from a local contractor.  Two months later, the exact same package arrived. The only changes: the date and the stamp on the outer envelope is a bit more straight, the date on the top of the letter, and Mr. Briggs claims a 48th year of experience.

In addition to the several Fails for Creative listed earlier, this package likely has an additional Fail for repeating the same letter exactly the same way twice. Resending a letter months later with no changes is not a typical Fail – a good creative can be mailed over and over again. In direct mail jargon, an optimized successful direct mail package is called a “Control”. The Control package is proven to be successful by testing against other packages that have different offers or creative format. If one of the package with the alternate offer or creative garners more response, then that becomes the Control. In other words, the Control is the one to beat in terms of getting response.

However, a package that is used multiple times without proving it’s success rate is not a Control. It is simply doing the same thing over again and expecting a different outcome.

Learning: Modify your base letter once in a while and test against your Control package frequently to improve long-term results.